Friday, July 27, 2007

The peculiar Europe weather

Greece is sweltering at 45 degrees, with forest fire breaking out. Yet 3 hours away (by flight) I am feeling dulan that the summer is NOT here at all raining freaking everyday and temperature being high 10s. Then other parts of England are flooding (like Oxford is completely flooded)

This is the right moment to exclaim,


On other news, I'm going to the Tate Modern today to see Salvador Dali!!

I totally regretted not going to Figueres when I was in Barcelona (at least I was only in BCN for 09 days. Dunno why Mr Tang didn't bother to take the 1.5hr train). But now, the mountain has come to Muhammad!

I'm a happy girl.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Guess what came through the post today?

Tell me how to not love a man who knows exactly what it means by

The way to a woman's heart, is through her stomach (even when 6,900 miles away)

Mr Tang, you good, you good.

Anyway, speaking of which, I used the fantastic sambal chilli sauce which he claims "will make us feel like we are back at chomp chomp" (IT DID!) and had a feast on the biggest fish we had seen thus far in London. With a sauce like this, we need to splurge on a real fish right? So, we went to the smelly fish store to buy a FRESH SALTWATER FISH - but I duno what fish it is, the fishmonger's Eastern European accent was too strong.

zees one for you darrrrling? no? too small? 'ow aboot zees one? you want ze squid?


Muchos gracias mi chico! Me gusta la presente! Te echo menos! Con amor y muchos besos. xx

Gross gross a bit you all also don't understand what. BLEH BLEH BLEH

Monday, July 23, 2007

Hello Muggles!

I'm off in my wizardy world for the next few (twenty?) hours. After that, I'm thinking of going to Central London and hold up a sign with the spoiler to the end of the book. That'd be quite funny. But then again, I risk people throwing sai at me. So better not.

Thursday, July 19, 2007





Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Growing up

You really realise you have grown up when you...

1. Look at someone and see them commit the same mistake as you did, and realise how painful it is to watch, but yet nothing can be done but to let them go through it too, for no matter what you say, they can never get it till they reach that point.

2. Look at someone say something really stupid and instead of complaining how stupid that person is, realise that it is because of the lack of worldly experiences and plainly say '(s)he's still young lah, that's why'.

3. Start thinking about how your future home is like (in a very realistic way)

4. Really realise what your mum said was true.

5. Start doing domesticated things and actually enjoying it.

6. Realise that the world is too big to save. Find a little corner of it and help that bit. That will be enough.

(to be updated)


I think I have changed my mind more times in the last few months than I have ever did, added together for the 24 years since.

First I decided to come back, then decided not to come back, then decided I should still come back and came back. Then I decided to find a job, then decided not to, and just go home after I've played enough, then decided to, then decided not to, then decided to, and went for an interview, then after not getting the ONE job that I applied for (of course, amongst some other emails I've sent out), decided not to again, then decided to just try again, try until I don't feel like trying, just for the sake of trying.

This has of course frustrated the boy, who first was really happy that I decided not to leave Singapore, then one day I informed him I'm still going back to London, and he took it well. After a week of being in London I told him I cannot bear to be away from him and decided to go home, but a day after told him otherwise. Then I tell him I'd be back late August, then suddenly there are exciting events coming up in early September and so I decided to stay till September. When I went for the interview thinking okay maybe I should work here for a while I told him I'm not coming back till end of the year but maybe before my birthday, then after that I told him I changed my mind again and want to be back after he returns from Alaska.

Well, if I am him, I also how dulan. But he is never angry. How nice.

Anyway, there is no conclusive decision at the mo, as I shall not write down something in black and white until I have decided confirmed guarantee chopped.

So yes, this is the update of my life thus far.

Friday, July 06, 2007

Buda? Pest?

It's 2ish in the morning and I am in the swanky Intercontinental Hotel Budapest. It has been 05 fun filled days, with the first 3 being (too) hot and sunny, but now I'm wishing for the sun to come back. All of the sudden, many thanks to global warming, the temperature dipped from 32 to 17 in a flash and my bikinis and summer dress are back in my luggage and out comes my jumper and jeans. And umbrella. At least the weather forecast says it's going to be sunny, albeit cold, for the next 2 days, so I am happy. So much for the fucking summer.

It has thus far been a good trip. Hanging out with a whole contingent of people on the road to their PhD who are here in Budapest to present their dissertation has been a great experience - very stimulating and actually, great fun. Jason thinks hanging out with too many smart people makes him feel stupid, but I tend to disagree. In fact, hanging out with these smart asses makes me realise that I am honestly quite smart too (I don't give a shit if you think ya right, as if - I think so can already), and it helps to reaffirm that I can do it too, if I want to. I hate that Shaun is always right, and there was this moment today where I heard his voice ringing in my head saying what he said to me a while ago, 'You know you have so much more potential in you, I am so disappointed you did not push yourself.'

And indeed I didn't. And did not graduate with the honours I (genuinely believe) could have gotten and settled for the very general degree, because 5 years ago honours didn't seem to matter and having fun seem to be the most important thing at that mo.

But it's not. And it's not whether or not people without the 1:1 or 2:1 honours succeed in life or not - at this moment I just feel like I've let myself down, academic-wise.

There is always the other side of the argument where people have achieved academically and felt that they could have done more with their lives during those period of time, or that it isn't as big a deal as everyone makes it, apart from the fact that they make more money than everyone else and make their parents proud during their convocation.


Anyhoo, all's been said and done. One thing I've learned from this going-away-from-Singapore is, once you made the decision, just move on in life. Once in a while it's okay to look back and reflect, for such reflection helps one grow, but don't regret, mope around feeling sorry. Just accept it as a mistake in life, as all man err, and make the best of now. Just be able to look at yourself in the mirror and be able to answer to yourself.

So what is my mid term goal to make it up to myself? Play enough in Europe, come back to Singapore, get a decent job, be in managerial position within the 4, 5 years so that the university that will accept my 1:1 boyfriend may accept me too, into their MBA Executive programme, then we can live happily ever after.